When you automate the right actions, you create the space and the ability to contribute. Your energy no longer goes into battling your old ways but into building something meaningful. The habits you create don’t just serve you. They serve your family and your community as well.
“Success is nothing more than a few simple disciplines, practiced every day.” ~ Jim Rohn
The Habit I Had to Break
I started smoking occasionally when I was about sixteen. It seemed cool at the time; I was working my first part-time job and several of the other guys smoked. It was a way to fit in. But by the time I was eighteen, I was fully hooked. And by thirty-six? I was up to three packs a day. It was costing me financially, physically, and mentally. I knew it had to change.
But breaking the habit was another matter. Quitting was “easy”. In fact, I did it at least three times. It was staying quit that was the hard part.
What finally helped me break the cycle? Two pivotal steps.
First, I avoided the environments and routines that triggered the urge. Certain situations, like driving, drinking coffee, lighting a fire in the fireplace, had become so intertwined with lighting up that the association was nearly automatic. By disrupting those patterns, I began to unravel the habit loop.
Second, I replaced the habit. I started walking. Eventually, walking turned into running. I focused on physical movement, breath, stamina, everything smoking had been eroding. One year after quitting, I marked the anniversary by running a mile.
At the time, I didn’t know the behavioral science behind what I was doing. I didn’t know about habit loops or the power of identity-based change. I was just desperate to quit and willing to experiment.
Years later, I would discover that what I’d done was in line with what we now know about how habits form. And how they can be changed. That’s the core of Excelerated Habits™: to use what we know to shape how we live.
How Habits Shape Our Lives
Whether you’re in your prime years or exploring life’s “second mountain,” you and I are living today with the habits we built yesterday. Every routine, every automatic action, every instinctive reaction — these are the invisible systems that run our lives.
And it doesn’t apply only to routines like brushing teeth or checking email. Our habits affect our health, our finances, our relationships, even our purpose.
We all have dreams. Big ones. But dreams don’t come true because we wish for them. They come true when we perform the behaviors that lead to making them habitual. Habits are the quiet architects of our lives.
If you’ve ever felt stuck, like you can’t gain traction on what matters most, chances are your habits are holding the keys. Unlock them, and you unlock momentum and the change you desire.
Habits and Identity
James Clear says, “Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you want to become.” Habits shape your identity. When you write every day, you become a writer. When you move daily, you become an active person. When you prioritize your family, you become a present parent or grandparent.
But it works the other way, too. If you think you’re disorganized, unhealthy, or “just not good at routines,” you’ll create habits that reinforce that belief. Changing habits means changing who you believe you are.
Habits and Well-Being
Want better health? Start by automating daily movement. Want a calmer mind? Build in moments of mindfulness. Want stronger relationships? Habitual kindness and attention go a long way.
Habits conserve your energy. Once a behavior becomes automatic, you don’t have to think about doing it. That frees up your mental bandwidth for deeper decisions and richer living.
Habits and Goal Achievement
Goals are important. But it’s your systems, made up of your habits, that get you there. Want to write a book? It’s the habit of writing that makes it happen. Want to run a marathon? It’s the habit of training. Want to simplify your life? It’s the habit of clearing out what no longer serves you.
The Habit Loop
Every habit has three parts: the cue, the routine, and the reward.
- Cue: Something triggers the behavior.
- Routine: The actual behavior you perform.
- Reward: The benefit or relief you get.
Understanding this loop helps you change it. For example, if the cue is boredom and the routine is snacking, the reward might be stimulation. You can’t just cut the habit, you have to replace it with something that delivers the same reward. Maybe a quick walk or a creative activity can give you the same lift.
How to Build Positive Habits
- Anchor the habit to something you already do. (“After I brush my teeth, I’ll do five minutes of stretching.”)
- Make it tiny. Start small enough that you can’t fail. (“One push-up,” “One paragraph,” “One drawer.”)
- Use positive reinforcement. Celebrate. Acknowledge. Track it visually.
- Repeat consistently. Don’t wait for motivation. Make it non-negotiable.
How to Replace Negative Habits
- Identify the cue. What triggers the habit? Time of day? Location? Emotion?
- Interrupt the routine. Add friction. Move the item. Change your environment.
- Swap the reward. Find a healthier behavior that meets the same need.
“Suppose You Want To…”
Let’s say you want to walk 30 minutes every day.
Cue: After lunch
Routine: Take a 30-minute walk
Reward: Fresh air, increased energy, a sense of accomplishment
Start small. Try 10 minutes. Or walk around the block. Make it enjoyable: listen to music or a podcast. Anchor it: “Every time I put my lunch dishes away, I walk.”
Within weeks, it’s no longer a decision. It’s just what you do. Now you’ve made walking a part of your identity: “I’m someone who moves every day.”
Now apply this to anything:
- Decluttering your house
- Practicing gratitude
- Eating healthier
- Spending time with your grandkids
- Praying or meditating daily
Simple actions, repeated daily, shape your legacy.
Start Here, Start Now
- Pick one area you want to improve. Health? Time management? Relationships? Finances? Pick one. Not three. Not seven. One.
- Start one new habit. Keep it small. Think “atomic” (as in Atomic Habits). Something so tiny it’s almost laughable. One glass of water. One push-up. One compliment.
- Stop one thing. What’s one habit you know isn’t helping? Late-night scrolling? Unplanned spending? Start by creating distance. Make it harder to do. Interrupt the loop.
- Use B=MAP (Fogg’s Behavior Model)
- Behavior = Motivation + Ability + Prompt
- Low motivation? Make it easier.
- Hard to do? Simplify it.
- Forgetting? Create a reliable prompt.
Bonus: Track it. Use a notebook, habit tracker, or app. But keep the streak going. Visual progress reinforces your identity.
Moving Forward Together
Always remember this: the habits you create don’t just serve you. They serve your family. Your community. Your legacy.
When you automate the right actions, you create the space and the ability to contribute. Your energy no longer goes into battling your old ways but into building something meaningful.
As Richard Rohr reminds us, this second half of life — this second journey — isn’t about proving yourself. It’s a time to give back. And habits help you live that purpose without constant struggle. They free you to love, to serve, to create, to show up fully.
This is the power of Excelerated Habits™. They enable you to change your behavior, and in the process, to transform your life and the lives you touch.
A Call to Action
This week, try this experiment:
- Pick one habit to build and one to break.
- Make it tiny. Make it daily.
- Track your progress.
- Anchor it to who you are becoming.
Let’s make it easier to do what matters most, one habit at a time. For that’s how you embrace your Excelerated Life™!
What is one thing you know would be beneficial if you started doing it (or stopped doing it)?
What is one tiny action you could take today, tomorrow, and the day after to get you started?
Commit to doing that action for one week and then evaluate your results.
Share your experience by leaving a comment below.
Excelerated Habits™ — automating your best behaviors — is one practice for creating your Excelerated Life™, a life of flourishing and well-being, and a life of meaning, purpose, and service.
Read more about the Excelerated Life™.
Resources:
Clear, James. Atomic Habits: Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results. New York: Avery, an imprint of Penguin Random House LLC, 2018.
Fogg, Ph.D., BJ. Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything. New York: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing Company, 2020.
Rohr, Richard. Falling Upward: A Spirituality For The Two Halves Of Life. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass, A Wiley Imprint, 2011.
This blog post includes research information provided by ChatGPT, an AI language model developed by OpenAI. The content was generated with AI assistance and is intended to provide information and guidance. Please note that the suggestions are not official statements from OpenAI. To learn more about ChatGPT and its capabilities, you can visit the OpenAI website.