The Excelerated Life

August 1, 2019November 2, 2020

Why You Need Positive Relationships

Creating positive relationships and nurturing our ties to other people are fundamental practices for flourishing and enhanced well-being. Simple practices have a large impact on improving our relationships. When we do them, our own happiness increases.

Once a month, my wife, Rebecca, and I join with other musicians we’ve met over the years for an acoustic jam session. We sit in a circle and each person takes a turn performing a song, while the rest of us join in. Depending on the size of the group, we go around the circle two or three times, then break to share the food we’ve all brought. After the break, we go back to the circle and go around once or twice more.

The group varies from month to month — we may have 12 or more or we may have only 5 or 6. We sing and talk and laugh and share a meal. By the end of the evening, I have connected to people with whom I have developed positive relationships over the years. I always leave in a more relaxed, peaceful state than when I arrived, especially if I’ve had a hectic, stressful week. In a word, I am happier.

July 25, 2019November 2, 2020

Time To Be

To discover and understand your purpose and to organize your life around it requires time . . . time to think about how you’ll manifest your purpose and time to reflect on your performance. Organize your time and your calendar to explicitly schedule in these activities.

A Tale Of Two Workers

This is a tale of two workers. Call them Tom and Tim.

Tom works hard. He’s busy all day. Here is a typical day for Tom. When he wakes up, Tom immediately reaches for his phone to check for messages and e-mails. Before he gets out of bed, his mind is already teeming with thoughts of what he has to do today. He gets up and rushes through showering and dressing for work. He skips breakfast — who has time? He’ll grab a fast food sandwich and a cup of coffee on the way to the office.

Once at the office, Tom checks his e-mail again, then his calendar. He has several back-to-back meetings scheduled. He also has a major project that is due by the end of the week but he hasn’t had time to work on it yet. Maybe he can get to it today. And oh yeah, there was that upset customer that called yesterday . . . he still needs to call her back.

July 18, 2019November 3, 2020

Getting By Is Not Enough

Having reserves is a state of being. Having a reserve is a state of mind. Both are required to free us up to pursue the Excelerated Life™.

Building A Financial Foundation

Most Thursday mornings, you can find me at United Ministries, an agency in downtown Greenville dedicated to “serve, transform, and empower those in need toward achieving self-sufficiency.” [1] United Ministries offers a number of different services to assist the homeless, the unemployed, and those mired in poverty.

I volunteer in the Employment Readiness program. Those enrolled in this program are unemployed or under-employed. They go through a week-long training related to the job search and, after successfully completing the program, they work with an employment counselor.

July 11, 2019November 3, 2020

Add Values To Your Life

Knowing and acting from your values means you are living an authentic life. Defining you Valid Values and choosing actions based on them — not based on how you feel — is embracing the Excelerated Life™!

Learning A Lesson

As a young husband and father, I believed that family well-being was one of my highest values. However, over time I realized that although I said I valued my family, I was spending a large portion of my time at work. I routinely worked nine or 10 hours a day. On many Saturdays and sometimes Sundays, I was in the office. Slowly I came to realize that I was putting work and career success ahead of my family.

July 4, 2019November 6, 2020

Become Immaculate

Tolerating situations, things, and people drains your energy and keeps you from being your best self. Taking the time and effort to fix them plugs the energy drain and helps you learn to deal with things as they occur and to “step over nothing”.

Hiding A Stain

Imagine you throw a big party. Lots of good friends, good food and good wine. But sometime during the evening, someone spills a glass of wine on your freshly-cleaned carpet. You can’t deal with it right now, but you plan to see to it in the morning.

Morning comes and you are faced with the huge stain. You can’t deal with it right now, but you plan to see to it right after work.

You come home, tired from a day of hard work. You walk in the door and see the big stain. You can’t deal with it right now – you’re way too tired – but you’ll see to it soon. Meanwhile, you cover the stain with a throw rug.

June 28, 2019November 6, 2020

Castaway

To reach any BIG goal, you must grow to the person who can achieve it. You grow by taking one small action after another. In this way you prepare for the opportunity when it appears.

Do you remember the movie, Cast Away, where Tom Hanks is stranded for several years on an island in the South Pacific? In the movie, Hanks is a time-obsessed trouble shooter for FedEx. At a Christmas dinner with family, he is called to resolve a problem in one of their foreign offices and leaves the dinner to catch a flight on a FedEx plane.

June 20, 2019July 17, 2019

Wishin’ And Hopin’

Our goals and aspirations generally fall into two categories – what we say we want and what we really want as shown by our actions. What do your actions say that you want?

“Just wishin’ and hopin’ and thinkin’ and prayin’ and plannin’ and dreamin’ . . .” ~ Wishin’ And Hopin’ by Dusty Springfield

Actions Speak Louder . . .

“I’m very dependable; you can count on me,” my friend told me at lunch one day. She did not see the irony in the fact that she had been 10 minutes late that day and had been late the last two times we met. I did what I usually do in those situations — I smile and nod and then watch to see if the actions suit the word. “Who you are speaks so loudly,” said Emerson, “I can’t hear what you are saying.”

June 13, 2019November 9, 2020

Small / Simple Daily Disciplines

Self-discipline is essential to growth and development. Establish small acts of discipline, practice them daily, and build on them as your sense of self-discipline gets stronger.

“Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise! It has no commander, no overseer or ruler, yet it stores its provisions in summer and gathers its food at harvest.” ~ Proverbs 6: 6 – 11 (NIV)

The Ant And The Grasshopper

Summertime, and the Grasshopper spent his days singing and hopping about, lazing away the hot days. One day the Grasshopper saw an Ant, toiling hard to drag a piece of grain to her nest.

“Why do you work so hard?” asked the Grasshopper. “Come, sing and dance with me. We can do as we please. It’s too hot to work so hard!”

“I’m storing up food for the Winter,” replied the Ant. “You should be doing the same. Summer won’t last forever.”

“Phuh!” said the Grasshopper. “Who cares about Winter? We have plenty of food right now.” And he went on singing and dancing, doing as he pleased.

June 6, 2019November 13, 2020

Make Productivity A Habit

To achieve any worthy goal, you must decide what is vital to the project, then structure your days so you can devote large chunks of time to those vital activities.

A Tale Of Two Workers

“It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.” ~ Charles Dickens, A Tale Of Two Cities

Andrew and Angela worked for the same company. They were hired at about the same time to join the company’s sales team. And there the similarities end.

Angela developed a habit of coming in to work at 7:00 AM, about an hour before most of the sales team arrived. She always had a list of tasks which she had prepared the night before. She came in, sat down, and went to work on the first task on her list.

May 30, 2019July 24, 2019

Don’t Be Good

Moral licensing gives you “permission” to do something “bad” after or because you’ve done something “good”. So don’t think of your actions as being “good” or “bad”. Instead, see yourself as being committed to your goal or to your self-improvement.

Good? or Bad?

Suppose you decide to exercise more. You plan to get up every morning and hit the gym. For three days, you’re there when the doors open. On the fourth day, you decide you need a rest and so you sleep in. Do you think that you’ve been “good” on the days you exercised and “bad” when you didn’t? Or suppose you intend to start eating a healthier diet. On Monday, you have a salad for lunch. On Tuesday, you have a salad for lunch. On Wednesday, someone brings doughnuts and you decide you deserve a treat for being “good” the last two days. So you eat a doughnut . . . maybe two. At lunch, you decide you’ve already blown your diet for the day so you order a double cheeseburger and fries.