A life of well-being, meaning and purpose.
To visualize,” said Peter McWilliams, “is to make visual lies. Visual lies, however, have a way of coming true.”
Visualization. You already do it . . . planning a party, replaying an argument and inserting what you “should’ve said”, daydreaming about an exotic vacation, fantasizing about Prince or Princess Charming. But did you know research shows that a specific type of visualization can help you reach your goals and help stimulate positive emotions? Continue reading “What If You Don’t?”
“Clutter isn’t just the stuff in your closet. It’s anything that gets between you and the life that you want to be living.” ~ Peter Walsh
“Waste lies not in the number of possessions but in the failure to enjoy them.” ~ Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin, Your Money or Your Life
Do you have “enough”? This is a two-sided question. If you don’t have a reserve of resources in all areas of your life, you spend your time scrambling to get your basic needs met. On the other hand, if you keep amassing resources beyond your reserves, you end up giving most of your time and life source to accumulating. Continue reading “Enough”
“Wisdom is letting go of some bad habits everyday.” ~ Farshad Asl
This is how I used to wake up. Clock goes off at 6:00 AM. Hit the snooze button. Clock goes off at 6:05 AM. Hit the snooze button. Clock goes off at 6:10 AM. Hit the snooze button. This continues till 6:30 or sometimes 6:45. Finally climb slowly out of bed, groggy and headachy from having too many beers the night before. Head to the bathroom, coughing and hacking because of my smoker’s cough. Pop a couple of Tylenol to help the headache. Continue reading “Breaking Negative Habits”
“The biggest lie we tell ourselves . . . is ‘I’ll do it later'”. ~ Peter McWilliams
You’ve heard me say before that Procrastination is one of my greater talents. Over the years, I’ve honed it to a fine skill. (At one time, my procrastinating was so bad that I was afraid of Saturday the 14th.) It’s the reason I think and write so much about overcoming procrastination – I need all the advice I can get.
I recently came across a technique that promises to be a great procrastination buster. Of course, there are a number of good ways to battle procrastination, and this is another good tool for those of us who find it so easy to “do it later”. Continue reading “A Procrastination Busting Technique”
“A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants, so that they did not bear grain. Still other seed fell on good soil. It came up, grew and produced a crop, some multiplying thirty, some sixty, some a hundred times.” (Mark 4: 3 – 8 NIV)
A young child sat by the bank of a pond. The child held a number of small stones in her hand. The child tossed one of the stones in the water and watched as ripples went out across the pond in ever-growing circles – larger and larger. She tossed in another, then another, and watched in delight as the ripples grew and ran across the surface of the water, sometimes overlapping, sometimes converging and then moving away from each other. The ripples moved all the way across the pond, much further than the child could have tossed one of her stones. Continue reading “Ripples”
“What human beings can be, they must be.” ~ Abraham Maslow
Abraham Maslow has been called one of the most famous psychologists of the 20th Century. His research into what makes successful and high-achieving people do what they do and be what they are is the precursor of the Positive Psychology movement.
The Hierarchy of Needs
Maslow is known for his “hierarchy of needs” – a ranking or scale of human needs. At the bottom are physical or physiological needs – air, food, water, sleep. Next are needs for safety and security – good health, secure employment, social and family stability. These two categories comprise our basic needs. Going up the hierarchy, next come needs for love and belonging – intimate relationships, friends, a sense of connectedness. Then, the need for self- esteem – achievement, respect of others, prestige. These two categories define our psychological needs. Finally, at the top of the pyramid, we reach self-actualization – what Maslow considered as achieving one’s full potential, that is “what one can be, one must be.”
“The mature human being goes about doing what needs to be done regardless of whether that person feels great or terrible. Knowing that you are the kind of person with that kind of selfcontrol brings all the satisfaction and confidence you will ever need.” ~ David K. Reynolds
June* sought out coaching because she couldn’t seem to finish any of the things she said she wanted to do. She had a good idea of what she viewed as her life’s purpose and she had some challenging goals to enable her to live out her purpose. But when we met for the first time, she had made little measurable progress on any of her goals. During one of our early meetings, she selected one of her goals and we developed an action plan to move her toward it. June left with a list of things she could do before our next meeting and she was excited to get started. Continue reading “Now What Needs To Be Done?”
“A mini habit is a very small positive behavior that you force yourself to do every day; a mini habit’s ‘too small to fail’ nature makes it weightless, deceptively powerful, and a superior habit-building strategy.” ~ Stephen Guise
Imagine this. You have a big, shiny new, exciting goal that you have embarked on. Perhaps you’ve decided to drop those extra pounds, or start the business you’ve been dreaming about, or write your memoir, or start a nonprofit, or visit the country you’ve longed to see, or run a marathon, or _____ (fill in the blank). This goal fills you with enthusiasm and excitement. You are energized . . . pumped!
You’ve got your plan in place and you’re ready to do this! For the first few days, maybe even a week or two, you are fired up about your goal and you knock out your daily actions. Continue reading “Too Small To Fail”
“You don’t learn from successes; you don’t learn from awards; you don’t learn from celebrity; you only learn from wounds and scars and mistakes and failures. And that’s the truth.” ~ Jane Fonda
It seemed fool-proof. An easy $100. The carnival side-show barker had lured me, girl friend in tow, over to his game. Ten wooden bottles stacked in a pyramid. All I had to do was pay $1.00 and knock over all 10 bottles — ten times. If I missed and didn’t knock them over, my ante doubled . . . $2, $4, $8, etc. But I figured I could easily knock over the 10 bottles ten times in 10 or 12 or 14 tries. My “investment” would be well under the $100 I was sure to win. So I paid my $1.00 and tossed the ball. Knocked over all but 1. No worries. I was only down $2.00 and I was sure I’d get them all from now on. Continue reading “Take Two”
